• gratuitous commented on the blog post ISIS Advancing Towards Baghdad

    2014-10-13 08:18:26View | Delete

    Whoa, bombing them didn’t work? Must be because we didn’t bomb them enough! Violence can never fail, it can only be failed. It’s our national religion, and you’d be hard pressed to find even the most ardent fundamentalist of one of those lesser religions (the ones that talk about God and stuff, instead of the real holy relics – bombs, missiles and bullets) who shows nearly the faith in their deity as our entire nation shows when it comes to violence. We believe in violence so totally and completely that even when it appears to fail, we blame ourselves instead of the violence.

  • Geez, those ISIS guys are soooo sneaky! Whoever would have thought that they would figure out they could blunt our mighty luftwaffe by scattering and hiding when they hear a bomber approaching? Inconceivable that they figured this out on their own. Prolly a high-level spy somewhere tipping them off. Or something.

  • I’m so old, I remember when the United States used to be against indefinite detention and holding people without charge or even hope of trial. We’d call the regimes that did that “totalitarian” and condemn them in strong terms, offering the United States as a bulwark of freedom, a bastion of laws and rules independent of the ruler.

    My guess is that the poor devils in Bagram will become poor devils at Guantanamo.

  • Holy smokes, that bottom photo. It would be kind of difficult to dismiss this as a focus group, but there will surely be sages trying to paint it that way.

  • My cynical nature says, never confuse announced plans with actual plans. Yep, we’ll train them folks over there real good to kill and die for the U S and A; it’ll be over in months, if not weeks; and won’t cost a dime over whatever we appropriated (and which, unlike spending on our own citizens, doesn’t have to be paid for with cuts to, say, congressional staff).

    Now, about that bridge to Brooklyn you wanted to buy. I got the deed right here in my pocket.

  • gratuitous commented on the blog post Goldman Sachs Admits Paying Bribes To Gaddafi Regime

    2014-09-22 08:43:32View | Delete

    But it’s just so complicated to prosecute these so-called crimes. Sure, it looks like bribery and corruption, but all the fine fellows at Goldman Sachs say it wasn’t bribery and corruption, so how can a mere Justice Department attorney possibly hope to sort it all out? You’d have to be some kind of super, investigative, law-knowing person to suss it all out! Rank Green Lanternism!

  • I did notice that Congress didn’t authorize any funds, but someone said the money was already there. Curious, isn’t it? There’s always money available for blasting stuff and people to smithereens, but when it comes to taking care of our own citizens, the well has run dry.

    Interesting way to try to defuse this exploding fireworks store: Ship in more bottle rockets, M-80s and firecrackers. Brilliant!

  • Is it part of the Border Patrol’s job to gun down anyone who wanders too close to their security perimeter, even if they remain in their own country? I seem to recall we gave the people of East Berlin a lot of trouble about doing things like that for 28 years. Some hard words about totalitarian states and captive people were often uttered.

    But if it wasn’t in this guy’s job description to plink foreign nationals in their own country, why does he still have a job? I would deem this as slightly more serious than appropriating a pen for personal use or making copies of my tax return on the company Xerox.

  • Boy, don’t those folks in United Arab Emirates, Qatar and Norway* look like a bunch of prize chumps! Those think tanks would have totally cranked out position papers favorable to those countries’ issues anyway, yet they spent millions of dollars to get something they could have gotten for nothing! At least, that’s what the recipients of the largesse are saying: Our clients are overspending nincompoops.

    Seems legit.

    *Norway? Really?

  • Looking at that photo, I wonder how much it costs per month to light that McDonald’s sign versus what it costs McDonald’s per month to employ someone to flip burgers?

  • I’d say that’s it in a nutshell. Notwithstanding the pablum peddled by the court, if “everybody knows” we tortured Mr. al-Qahtani, then the visual evidence of that torture probably isn’t going to get the people who know even more wound up than they already are.

    Our failure to identify, prosecute and jail the perpetrators of these crimes against humanity (and, despite all the rhetoric and bombast, Mr. al-Qahtani remains a human being) is the even darker mark against the dark mark of our torture regime.

  • I helped pay for this. Let me see what I got for my money.

  • The message to the rest of the cohort at Guantanamo couldn’t be clearer: Don’t make waves, don’t question your orders. All of those orders are totally lawful, you’re not a lawyer, and your “opinion” about legality isn’t a good enough reason to refuse to participate in torture. You’re as fucked as the people we’re torturing, and there’s no exit, no escape.

    Now, say “God Bless America.” Say it!

  • What SHOULD be done? Well, our nation’s default setting is to blow up a lot of things, and kill a lot of people whether they’re involved or not. Oddly enough, it appears that our friends in ISIL are a direct product of that very policy. Seems that when you pick a fight with a billion Muslims like we did under George W. Bush, some of them are likely to respond with a murderous fury that mystifies some people.

    What SHOULD be done? How about instead of sending over weaponry that keeps falling into the wrong hands, we send over civil engineers and a few thousand able-bodied young men and women, along with a bunch of equipment and building materials? Maybe we could re-build some of Iraq’s decimated infrastructure that we destroyed over the last decade. Get the electricity back on. Build some housing. Restore running, potable water. The young people would get a tidy annual income for their work, learn some skills, and come back to the United States and do it here, too. As their presence decreased, we could employ Iraqis to do this as well.

    What SHOULD be done? How about we give this plan seven years, which is less time than we spent destroying the place. I’ll bet it would be cheaper, and we’d have something to show for the effort besides another ISIL group that is a threat to everything we have, and beyond anything we’ve ever seen (presumably including the Soviet Union and Mao’s China – insert eye roll here). Make Iraq a functioning society again, and give the Iraqis something of their own to fight for and protect instead of a bunch of rubble we spent a decade bouncing.

  • Now that the car is plunging over the cliff, what are all you peaceniks gonna do? Huh? We’re in big trouble, and you all just want to hold hands and sing Kumbayah.

    Wait; you told us a decade ago that this was going to happen, didn’t you? Well, now that it’s come to pass, it all you dirty fucking hippies’ fault that you didn’t try harder to stop the madness of war. So we have no choice – No choice at all, I tell you! – but to get them dogs of war back out of the kennel.

  • Wow, so after 11 years of atomizing Iraq and its society, some forces have coalesced around the most bloodthirsty elements, and are committing horrific murders to wave in our faces? Well, perhaps next time we’ll know better before haring off to war. If only someone had warned us ahead of time that this was a possibility. Where were all those bleeding heart peaceniks in 2002 and 2003 when this new product line of invading Iraq was being rolled out and market tested? Libruls, huh.

    But now we can all watch Matt and Tamron look appropriately frowny-faced and express their deepest concern about those awful, horrible terrorist people in Iraq.

  • Gee, everyone thinks that al-Maliki is the sole source of all the trouble in the area. I wonder how the people of Iraq feel about that? After all, they elected him in a free and fair election. Or does their opinion count for anything?

    How would the United States have reacted if, say, a bunch of other countries had demanded the ouster of our elected leader because he was a clueless ersatz cowboy given to invading other countries on flimsy pretexts? Hypothetically speaking, of course.

    Do we really think we have any credibility to spend in the region? Excluding any credibility conferred by having the biggest military on the planet, of course.

  • That’s understandable. After all, how can NBC trust its own video and photos? A very slippery slope, if you ask me. On the other hand, David Gregory can solicit comments from one of his guests for a video the guest couldn’t see that purported (by the Israeli government) to show weapons fire emanating from a Palestinian hospital that Israel was trying to justify bombing. That’s real journalism, as practiced by the National Broadcasting Corporation.

  • gratuitous commented on the blog post Late, Late Night FDL: Mission Statement

    2014-07-23 07:28:13View | Delete

    Whoa, is that the head of Dr. Demento appearing in that video? My lame claim to fame is that I recognized it! Top that.

  • In case someone in the administration needs to know what courage looks like (and giving Israel a pass on this crime against humanity isn’t courageous), I submit this: “The nursing building was bombed. Seventeen patients who could not be evacuated remained in the building, along with foreign activists who refuse to leave the hospital as long as patients remain there.”

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