Thanks for the experience. Lots of good comments and questions.

Enjoy the last hours of Mothers Day,

Your question is the right one. I think we may have to change some of the words we use which polarize people–and for the short time avoid divisive topics. For example, if we could agree on access to good prenatal care, it would be difficult to argue against that.
Recently in Nebraska, the anti abortion legislature and the anti abortion governor debated funding of prenatal care for illegal immigrants. The legislature passed it, the governor vetoed it, and the legislature over rode his veto.
Why? They believed it would have been more expensive in the long run to deny prenatal care because more babies would end up in intensive care.
The lesson–there can be agreement on some things, and let’s build on that.

In researching my book, I was surprised to find that out too–these poor women stay home because they don’t have the skills and they can’t find affordable childcare. The answer is education and access to good chidcare. When I was Governor I started a Reach Up program that provided education and childcare, and every once in a while meet someone who benefited from the program and got a new life. That is what welfare reform should be.

The media clearly likes sensationalism and dismisses the daily issues that women struggle with. Another issue of Time featured “Women are the Richer Sex.” Hmmm. what about the majority of women stuck in poverty?
Newsweek had a cover story about “Working women’s fantasies of submission.” Now, really?
When you think about what that implies, it’s shocking. Women can’t be strong leaders, they want to be dominated–and that’s what they think about?

I don’t think Time even wanted to encourage breast feeding, just sales.

Yes, the LGBT community has had enormous success in changing people’s attitudes –and it happened in a very short time. The President’s endorsement personally for same-sex marriage is a landmark–he couldn’t have done it without the activism of many people who “came out” and turned out to be a member of the family, co worker, or friend.
They also were able, sometimes, to cross party lines. What can we learn? We have to focus more clearly on what is needed, we have to raise the money to get our voices heard, and we have to educate the public about the high prices we are now paying by ignoring what most families need to say strong, caring and solvent.

Yes, the business community has opposed policies like paid sick days and paid family leave. They also opposed unpaid family leave which is now law. The US Chamber of Commerce –one of the wealthiest lobbying constituencies–has to be countered by mobilizing women and men to speak up and make the argument that these policies are not “job killers” but “job creators.”
I find it interesting that global companies which do business abroad in countries that have these policies, seem to make a profit when they have to provide their employees paid family leave because it is the law. If they can provide that for workers abroad, why can’t they do the same at home?

Working moms and stay at home moms should not be divided or pitted against each other. When finances permit, when and whether to stay home or go to work, is a very personal decision. The media loves to write about the Mommy Wars, but realistically, most mothers spend part of their time as mothers at home and another part at work.
The hard part is that society has made it very difficult to stay at home, unless a partner or spouse earns income large enough to single handedly support the family.
My hope is that women can unite on these issues, because they are pro-strong family issues. The future of the American economy depends on our being able to achieve better family/work policies.

Thrilled that you call it a “must read.”

Be sure to read today’s New York Times, Book Review, “The New Feminist Agenda” is on the front cover.

Yes –the outlook is bleak,but we can’t give up. We must change the debate to force politicians to address these questions. Democrats haven’t put this on their agenda either–if they did , or if Republicans did, they would be surprised to learn that this is the best way to win the women’ vote. This election is going to be determined by the women’s vote—as they feel attacked by the” war on women.”
Why not put quality affordable child care on the list?
The other route, is the state route. I go into some detail on that in my book. Connecticut just passed a paid sick day law for service workers. A bill in Congress is not getting any traction. The CT law is now highly popular. We have to start somewhere.

You give me more credit than I can accept. I think we need a strong grass movement to let politicians and the President know that the public is behind these policies We have to require that lawmakers respond to our questions about family/friendly policies and hold them accountable.
We have to encourage enlightened business people to speak out on why they have policies, like paid leave, and that it is part of doing business and improves the bottom line.

I agree. Legislation should be about “opportunity” not about being forced to do something you don’t want to do.
But most fathers I suspect, would be thrilled to take some paternity leave, if they could afford to do so.

I don’t think we should have mandatory paternity or maternity leave. This should remain a choice. The paternity leave in other countries is “use it or lose it.” If it is made attractive enough, with substantial pay, more people will use it.
The US has unpaid Family and Medical Leave Act, signed by Bill Clinton. The problem is lot of people can’t afford to use it. When you have a new baby, or someone is sick, your expenses go up, a terrible time to give up a pay check. Paid family leave (the amount varies) is the only practical answer if we want mothers to be able to bond with their babies, and not have to give up their jobs in doing so.

I had not heard of that happening elsewhere. In most countries that have paid family leave there is a tax like unemployment tax that pays for it. The two states, California and New Jersey, that have implemented it, have a temporary disabilities act that pays for it.

I think it was the right decision, though my point is, this family/work is not exclusively a feminist issue, but we need feminists to rally around it.

We have to try to find a way to get common ground–not easy in this polarized environment. These issues are not necessarily liberal, they are family issues. My ideal would be to recapture the phrase “family values” from the right–where it means everything from being against same sex marriage to the NRA, and have a discussion about values that strengthen the family, beginning with good pre natal care. Once again a recent report revealed that the U.S
has one of highest premature birth rates in the developed world.
Can we agree on changing that?

Absolutely right. Long term studies–40 years–have shown that very poor children who had high quality childcare were shown to have lower incarceration rates, higher employment rates and more stable families. Investing in good childcare is not only about test scores–it creates life long social skills like being alble to finish a task, focus and communicate.
We made such an investment with the GI bill of rights at the end of WW II, and it created the middle class, we have to do it again, for our children to save the middle class.

I did have a lively discussion with my publisher about using the word “feminist” in the title. She won. But, I think it attracts as many people as it may turn off. I hope people pay attention to the subtitle too: “the next revolution for women, work and family.”

Feminists have often lead the way on these issues, but we need a broader constituency to implement them.
I am pleased by the response to the book’s message so far–most women have felt conflict between their work lives and their family lives and are looking for answers.

At the beginning of the women’s movement some women’s banks were formed, I think one survives but they had a hard time making it.
I think we have to continue to stress reforms on Wall Street and the banking system for everyone to prevent failures like that recently announced loss of Morgan Stanley. Instead, Republicans, including Romney want to repeal Dodd Frank.

I’d like to know what young women are thinking who are following this. What do you think?