They also actually believe that they’re “witty.”

To be accurate, they believe themselves to be “wits”. They’re half right.

Twitter: the natural medium for bird-brains.

Bwahahaha! Our conspiracy has cornered the market in tin foil, thus denying to the freaked-out wingnuts their only true defence against O-ray mind control.

Not that ‘aluminium’ stuff, that actually *amplifies* the O-rays, but true, pure TIN foil.

Once the wingnuts wake up to the threat it will be far too late, and they’ll be reduced to carrying the rainbow flags in Rmoney’s concession parade.

It appears that Gettysburg will be the high-water mark of the Santorum surge, squirting up from the nether regions of the Deep South.

I really hate it when those GOP bastards don’t bother to flush…

“Obama’s Symbionese ACORN Army was threatening the life of young blonde white princess Chelsea Clinton?”

What, did they carve a backwards “B” on her cheek? ’cause that’s like a blah-gang tagging or something.

If the ol’Professer is going to bitch about campus gun policies, he should just move his ass to Regency U or Liberty U.

I’m sure THEY allow CC on campus, don’t they? And Regency is well known for the “quality” of their lawyering, so Glenn will fit right in.

Dana Loesch? Wasn’t she the one that approved of pissing all over our dead enemies?

“hey, Breitbart. Have a fuckin’ great day”

While Satanists prefer to fly under the radar, I’m sure they could get behind a practice like this.

Because St. Ronaldus Magnus certainly deserves posthumous binding to the Lord of Darkness, enfolded in his wings, and lovingly toasted in eternal flame.

As for Loesch, I just hope to outlive him, so that I can dig him up and shit in his mouth. Only problem is that I don’t like standing in really long lines.

So it’s okay for the gubbmit to impose invasive and onerous conditions on citizens that wish to exercise a legal “choice” that the rest of us find morally objectionable?

Okay dokie: From now on, each year someone wishes to claim the “carried interest” deduction, first they have to get naked, stick a plunger handle up their butt, and parade down Wall Street between the hours of 9AM and 4PM while playing “It’s a Small World” on a kazoo. Proving their eligibility requires getting a video of their parade and posting it on YouTube.

Hey, it’s a *choice*. They don’t have to take the deduction.

Well, Murray’s been making the rounds, as has a quiz from his book which is supposed to tell you “How Thick Is Your Bubble”

Okay, somebody better alert Jeff Foxworthy that Murry is infringing on his “you might be a redneck if..” schtick.

Copyright and trademark lawsuits might be needed; but I think a “steel cage death match” on PPV would be more true to their vision of America.

Why the photo of Mitch McConnell munching on eucalyptus leaves?

That’s not Mitch, that’s a drop bear!

Mitch is hanging out in the three-toed sloth enclosure. The House TP faction are in the “poo-flinging” corner of the Monkey House.

I’m sure I’m not the only viewer in America who, when Palin dropped her first mangled phrase, sat up a little straighter on the couch and said, “Hey, I think she just spouted gibberish at me.” By the end it was so illiterate it was almost mesmerizing. It sent little squirmishes through the screen, ricocheting around the language centers of millions of viewers.

If there was a method to her madness, you could characterize it as “verbal impressionism”: meaningless if examined with clarity, but for listeners with hearing impaired by the sounds of the inner paranoid voices, the hamster-wheels, and the crackle of overloaded circuits in their brains, Palin’s gibberish triggers sympathetic reactions.

But no, I doubt it was intentional. It’s just the Palin has the same frequency hamster-wheel running in her head, so it sets up sympathetic vibrations.

Well, yes, from the position of the teatards on the political spectrum, Newt IS a socialist.

And Hitler is a liberal, just like DoughBob LoadPants told us.

They are very, very. Very, VERY far out on the righty-right-RIGHT end of the spectrum. And they can *almost* see reality from there if they use binoculars, and squint really hard.

‘Lil Ricky is like that faded ugly stain on the sofa that you can never quite get rid of.

But perhaps it’s not so strange that the GOP doesn’t want Santorum for one of their “flavors of the month” selections.

I mean, ewww.

Cain must not be a TRUE conservative.

Otherwise, he wouldn’t deny harassment, but would take pride in it, wear it as a badge of honor; perhaps quietly, with a little smirk, a twirled mustache, but still a matter of pride in his masculinity.

From his reaction, and the reaction of the GOP, denying and running away from the allegations, we can conclude that the liberals have WON the day, and that Cain is our little pansy bitch.

..or words to that effect.

It’s not *exactly* a “circle jerk”.

More like a Biscuit Game.

…and the last one remaining gets to “eat the biscuit”.

what’s a real ‘Murcan like Brinsdon even doing in an intermediate Spanish class in the first place?!?

To quote a former Texican governor: “If the English language was good enough for Jesus Christ, it’s good enough for the schoolchildren of Texas.”

Hard to argue with that.

Wow, TBogg, that was some great sleuthing.

Finding that photo of Bachmann without her humanoid mask, celebrating after a GOP debate, I mean.

You know, I saw that headline and my first thought was, “Fuck you, Dick, just die already.”

Assuming that you’re talking about Cheney…his pulse has already stopped. Just declare him dead and bury the fucker.