I’m sitting outside in a cafe on a rare sunny day in my part of SF, reading a fascinating book, Nexus, about the next stage in human evolution. Will we use our technology for creation or destruction? To lift people up or enslave them? Will we lead with compassion and love or hate and anger?
Two guys sit next to me. One, late 20′s Asian in a tee shirt, the other a “bro” in sunglasses and a faux tux shirt. Think 20-something, less-handsome Christian Bale from the movie American Psycho.
Bro starts talking about a girl he met while with his girlfriend, Hailey, at a bar. He describes her as “ugly, like Windows 8″ (which was kind of clever, but clearly it was a new joke he was working) and talks about giving her advice on men and suggests she lose weight. He sells it to her with the line, “I wouldn’t be telling you this if I didn’t think you had potential.” His girlfriend, “Gave me a talking to about this, but it felt good though to tell an ugly girl to lose 20 pounds.” he said laughing.
Then he the proceeds to talk about what women “really like.” It starts with them knowing they have lots of competition. “I got three fresh new numbers the night after I first met Hailey and she wouldn’t hookup with me.” She complained when she found out, ‘Why wouldn’t you wait for me?’ He points out, “Women, SAY that they want you to be nice but they really don’t. They don’t respect a guy who stays home waiting for her call.” And he gives the advice of an abuser, “You make them feel insecure then you open your arms and they come back. And then you’re the man, you’ve got the power again.”
Asian guy describes his pick up technique in cafes, “I tell the girl I want to meet to watch my laptop while I go to the bathroom.” (Holy crap, now I understand why all the people I asked to watch my laptop kept giving me their phone numbers!) He describes the older woman that Bro spotted him with at a Japan Town cafe. Asian guy kind of likes her, thinks she’s “high level.” Bro thinks he’s getting too emotional, and explains how he could “sweep in” on this older women by “removing yourself from the whole situation, kind go on ‘autopilot.’” Bro says, “She will probably hook up with you on the first date and take you back to her place.” (BTW, how did they know she was older? Her confidence. Plus her shoes, socks and hair. “Did you see her hair? She definitely had older lady hair.“)
Bro asked Asian guy, “Do you like white women? Because if you do, you totally want to go to Walnut Creek.” Why? That’s where the dumb blonde girls are. They make plans to go down to Walnut Creek with “fake stories” and score with some “slutty suburban girls.”
Next he talked about this woman he broke up with, Stacy, who was “crazy” and contacted his old employer accusing him of “crazy stuff I never did.” After the HR department told him they had received info from her he said he could prove it was all made up and he was going to the police department to file a restraining order on her.
So, already I think this guy is a major jerk on multiple levels. Then he proceeds to describe how Asian guy can game the system at Levis by spending $250 on jeans to get 40% off the purchase, then returning three of the jeans so he can get the one he wants at 40% off. It’s a system that the Levi’s “cashier lady” was too slow to understand how he was going to get his 40% discount on one pair of jeans. He’s a financial genius!
Finally he talks about his interview at JPM and how he hadn’t heard back from them. At first I heard JPL and wondered, “Jet Propulsion Lab? Really?” But then the Asian guy asked, “Would you ever work in “Wealth Management?” Bro said, “Only if it was for a name firm like Blackrock or Pimco, not some D-Bag Assets place” So JPM is clearly JP Morgan since he mentioned two other firms he had interviewed with.
The “Qualities” of the Wall Street Mindset
So this guy in one conversation proceeded to show the following that mirrors many WS corporations: